Well we're a month into lockdown and we've officially completed Netflix! We're all 5k'd out and quite frankly sick of the sight of sourdough. So whats next? "A
nine million piece jigsaw" we hear you cry.
Don't dust off that puzzle box just yet, we've compiled a list of the best, trashiest and most binge worthy TV shows that time (and you) forgot.
From Paris Hilton to Lawrence Llewelyn Bowen, consider your Quarantelly sorted. Here's the list that nobody asked for but everyone needs.
Take a bunch of stroppy, fag wielding teenagers, add in a shouty overbearing American Wilderness Coach. Sprinkle in a couple of meaningless spiritual mantras like " That the fires we kindle here" (yes this is actually one of them) and voila....Brat Camp is born.
Is it cheesey? YES. Is it gimmicky? Absolutely. Is it good telly? Probably not. Did we just watch the entire series in one afternoon. HELL YES!
MY SUPER SWEET 16
If "Brat Camp" wasn't bratty enough for you, enter "My Super Sweet 16" Think giant pink dresses that look like those frilly toilet roll covers your Nana used to have. Flashing dance floors, ridiculously extravagant cars wrapped in a giant bow and lots and lots of tantrums. Highlights include a cameo appearance from Rihanna at one teens party and a girl getting a giant zit removed by a surgeon the day before her big day, we've all been there.
This is Brits Abroad at their absolute finest. Gordon Ramsey takes his trademark scrunched up angry face to Costa del Somewhere to criticise peoples failing businesses one manky kebab at a time. Only four episodes, so savour them, like a Benidorm full English.
A newie but a goodie. This is every bit as weird and creepy as it sounds. One girl with five complete strangers in her house for a week and so ensues awkward conversations with mum, weird drunk nightclub snogs, testosterone fuelled scraps and finally, a relationship that undoubtedly doesn't last past the end of the credits.
He's back. Everyones favourite interior designer/home wrecker. Tbf you have to wait 'til series two to see ol' Llewelyn Bowen but Series 1 is better anyway. It's basically a trip around Australia to view and inevitably criticise the homes of some rather effervescent characters, with a dash of clever scheming, plenty of cattiness and a smothering of spite along the way
We assume they are using the word "celebrity" loosely here. But that aside its pretty amusing watching a bunch of 'em shoved on a bus, forced to interact and take part in sometimes ludicrous, sometimes mundane but always chaotic tasks. It's like the Chuckle Brothers, but there's loads of them, and they're on the move. To me, To you!
Does this even need an introduction? Remember that time they made a floating shelving unit for some poor lady's prize possessions, her life-long collection of ornamental teapots. Then it fell down and every single one of them smashed to smithereens? Yeah, well basically just that but for like 900 seasons. Get stuck in.
If you haven't seen this then you've been living in a cave for the past month, or you just don't work at Lazy Oaf. We're all obsessed and not ashamed to admit it. It's like Love island but even cringier and 100% our type on paper. We just hope that the phrase 'naughty possum' doesn't become a thing, that’d be almost as bad as Bryce murdering a ‘love song’ on his keyboard.
Quite simply ICONIC. Paris Hilton and Nicole Richie bulldoze their way around America in a whirlwind of diamantes. The concept is supposedly that they work "normal jobs" and interact with "normal people" but this is really just an excuse to show how disgustingly rich and frustratingly still VERY funny they are.
NGL we're not 100% sure what’s going on in this half the time. People coming in pretending to be their own Mums, slightly incestual flirtations, "life long bonds" being formed through computer screens, everything is controlled by a robotic voice, and all this from a block of flats in Manchester. Dunno, it's strange, but scarily addictive. If you don't end up loving Tim and his loveable fluffy companion ‘Bey’ from series 2 by the end of it, then you'll be extradited from our Circle of Trust.